memeguy-com:

The gym


random-nexus:

serpentsrose:

solar-tsunami:

doctorattanowinchesterholmes:

jellybabiesandjammiedodgers:

apathbetweenthestars:

Source

brb drowning myself in the toilet

I once had a customer ask me how many pieces come in a six piece mozzarella stick. Then another ask me what kind of cheese comes in the mozzarella sticks.

I have had a customer asked me if the prawns we sold were alive.

I had a customer ask me how many tacos came in a 12 pack of tacos

I weep for the species…




(Source: thecutestofthecute)




cwtae-likeblackholesinthesky:

bestofnowyoukno:

nowyoukno:

Now You Know more about Pope Francis! (Source)

Pimpin’ Pope

Someone finally to bring religion out of the dark ages and integrate it with modern society.

What is a religion? It’s people. It’s not a book, or a building, or priests and preachers. It’s the people.

People change. Societies change. Therefore religion must change to keep from denying the development and improvement of societies. But mostly it’s the other way around: societies are supposed to conform to a never-changing set of rules, which may or may not have ever happened.

"Foolish rules of ancient date designed to make us all feel great while we fold spindle and mutilate those unbelievers from a neighboring state."



aimso:

Apparently how people feel after waking up from naps.

image

How I feel after waking up from naps.

image



batman-nolanverse:

feministprinc3ss:

i want this framed and above my bed tbh

teamcoco:

From last night’s #CONAN monologue.  (at Warner Bros Stage 15)

theonion:

FBI Uncovers Al-Qaeda Plot To Just Sit Back And Enjoy Collapse Of United States

comedycentralstandup:

Todd Barry is your Stand-Up Month Comedian of the Day. Watch his stand-up highlights here.